Wednesday, August 15, 2007

An Open Letter to Ocean Beach Elitists

An Open Letter to Ocean Beach Elitists
By Edgar Spenser

I am a tourist. I don't live in Fire Island, New York. But I do visit beautiful Fire Island beaches. In summers past, I would catch the Patchogue Fire Island ferry and relax at Davis Park. For a change of pace, I recently checked the Fire Island ferry schedule and hopped on a Bay Shore Fire Island ferry to explore Ocean Beach’s amazing shopping, dining, and drinking choices.

While visiting Ocean Beach, I learned about the controversy surrounding ABC’s One Ocean View, the Fire Island reality TV show. I’m not a fan of reality TV. I can understand why some locals are annoyed by One Ocean View and the mere idea of a Fire Island reality TV show. However, my sympathy for the cause dissolved when I encountered a couple of obnoxious Ocean Beach locals. I do not wish to cast aspersions upon the entire Ocean Beach Fire Island community, but I feel compelled to address Ocean Beach elitists with ugly attitudes, and give them a dose of reality (not reality TV, mind you - just reality).

My first encounter happened on Main Street in Ocean Beach. I brought my skateboard to Ocean Beach because it is lightweight, compact transportation. I know that biking is part of the Fire Island community, so I figured skateboarding would be OK, too. Most of the time, I carried my skateboard. Away from Main Street in Ocean Beach, when there was no pedestrian or bicycle traffic, I would hop on my board to cover more ground while exploring.

As I carried my skateboard and window shopped along Ocean Beach’s Main Street, I noticed a mustachioed guy walking towards me, wagging his finger in my general direction. In denial that anyone would have the nerve to wag their finger at me, I kept walking, eyes fixed straight ahead. But as the mustachioed clown drew closer, it became apparent that he was wagging his finger at me. He raised his hand higher, arm outstretched, until his finger wagged in my face as he walked past.

"That's against the rules," he spat as he walked by. As soon as I figured out he was talking about my skateboard, I turned and snapped back "I’m carrying it." The mustachioed clown wisely kept on walking - though I hoped he would engage me in debate so I could expose his asinine attitude publicly. Carrying a skateboard is not against the rules. I checked with an Ocean Beach policeman to make sure. The resident’s obnoxious finger-wagging was presumptuous, out-of-line, and annoying.

My second encounter occurred inside a shop on Main Street. As I browsed, I struck up a conversation with a clerk, who was welcoming and friendly. As I explained to her that I was on a Fire Island day trip, checking out Ocean Beach for the first time, a clown in a cowboy hat literally butted into our conversation . . . physically insinuating himself between us to announce, "I'm not a DAY TRIPPER so I wouldn't understand."

With a smug nod, the cowboy clown moseyed away, lingering to browse. Now, when this rodeo clown said "day tripper," his voice dripped with scorn and disdain. From that tone, I knew he was an Ocean Beach local who looks down his nose at us visitors.

I met wonderful people in Ocean Beach that day, too - Fire Island rental tenants and even some long-time Fire Island residents. But the two aforementioned clowns were peas in a pod; their respective repulsive behaviors driven by the same misguided, snobby self-entitlement.

For these two Ocean Beach elitists and their ilk, I have an important message: Ocean Beach does not belong to you. We Fire Island visitors are welcome to enjoy the same Fire Island beaches, shops, bars and restaurants as you. It is not your place to enforce or fabricate "rules." Desperate attempts to assert authority via "rules" will not grant you any control or power over Ocean Beach. Wagging your fingers at Fire Island day trippers will not make them disappear; nor will arrogant rudeness. What did you expect, buying Fire Island real estate in a beautiful beach community with great shops and restaurants - a ghost town?

If you xenophobic Ocean Beach snobs desire tight control, elitism, and total privacy, then I have a suggestion: move to Fire Island’s Point o’ Woods. There are no day trippers there because it is a private, fenced community. Or maybe try Fire Island Pines, or even Ocean Bay Park - though you’d have to deal with Fire Island Flynn’s crowds. If you can’t move from Ocean Beach, then check your aristocratic attitudes, swallow your elitism, and accept the fact that you must share with tourists.

If you have issues with a friendly, respectful visitor carrying a skateboard and shopping in Ocean Beach, then you’ve got much more serious issues on the horizon. ABC’s One Ocean View, the Fire Island new reality TV show, debuts soon. Like all reality TV shows, this Fire Island reality TV show will get lots of attention. You know what that means? Ocean Beach will soon be swarming with even more tourists. They’ll be filling Fire Island ferries, snoozing in Fire Island hotels, and otherwise overtaking Ocean Beach.

Give these tourists a chance, OK? They’re not here to ruin your lives; they’re here to share in the pleasures of this beautiful Fire Island community. Besides, most of these tourists would certainly represent a dramatic character improvement over the two obnoxious Ocean Beach locals I encountered.

Copyright FireIsland.com

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